Poetry by Turki Al Mayzani
By God, this haunting thought gives me no rest,
It keeps my eyes awake, torments me — and I have tormented it.
I try to hide it, yet sorrow betrays me,
Entrenched in my chest as though my chest were its home.
You who reproach my obscurity — do not make me explain,
Nothing remains in my heartbeat but its fading echoes.
I greet grief before it greets me,
And love its face, and whisper in secret: if only.
If only, before my steps would slip, it would counsel me,
Or else free my heartbeat from its demons.
And the dear one for whom longing slaughters me —
Time passed with him; he never came to me, nor did I go to him.
O master of grace, before I tell you I miss you,
I will share with you words about you that I kept hidden.
Do you know what my greatest sin was — God forgive me?
Turning my back on you, when you were the one I longed for.
And this is what torments me and wounds me:
I say I will forget it, yet I have never forgotten you.